New York City Day 2

December 04, 2009
Today we went on the subway to Harlem. I had so many stereotypes of what I thought it would be. I think some of them were true--but then again I wasn't there very long....
We went with the Relief Bus. We were handing out soup--but then Kaitlyn and I went to talk to a man named Angel. I think he was homeless.

His mother died on Thanksgiving day.

Friday he was getting picked up to go to her funeral. My assumption was that he was on drugs at some point of his life becuase he repeated himself alot. (which turned out to be a totally WRONG assumption--to read his full story check out the Relief Bus on Facebook and find Angel's video) Kaitlyn prayed for him. He really liked Pepsi--so Brad gave him a Pepsi and the biggest smile borke out on his facem.

We also met Juan. We found out he had a history in prison for killing his brother for raping his mother and later stabbin two people. He is HIV+ and the sickness is slowly killing him. It was from a drug needle. I don't feel like he had much hope--just making it through each day--just trying to survive.

It makes me wonder if his knowing of having HIV is killin him faster than he would if he didn't know. Such debilitating thoughts can sometimes kill you faster than a disease can.....

"let's just go ahead and be who we're meant to be...without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves to others...." Romans 12:5-6

New York City Day 1.2

Thursday, December 03, 2009
Dear Jesus--We're in NYC! My favorite city in the world! I thank you Lord for the opportunity to be here. For this opportunity is from you. I thank you for being with us as we travel. I look around at all these teens down here in the hostel basement--all eating breakfast. Lord teach me how to love them. Father allow my heart to be open to you and to them. I pray for divine connections. I pray Lord that I'll stay focused upon you Jesus and the things you desire to happen Jesus. Help me to not focus upon my own needs but on the needs of the people. Help me Lord to just LOVE THEM. In you--Amen

Today we went to the Bronx to the World Vision Storehouse. We didn't venture to far into that part of the city so I didn't really get to see what the city looked like. It looked alot like the older party of Vandalia or Dayton. At this storehouse, everything is donated by different companies. Things from furniture all the way down to erasers for pencils! Then different churches and schools could come and get supplies for free. I never knew World Vision did that kind of thing too besides child sponsorships.

I worked with CJ from 10-2 unpacking boxes....

We then walked around the city and saw some of the sites. We saw Wall Street. While we were there, and once we got to that section of town, it was like the weight of currency and money floating around couldn't be ignored. Business people in suits were everywhere in a big hurry. With their tall skinny bodies, perfectly combed and shined hair, big shiny boots and long strides....The weight of the sin of greed was all around me.

We also went to the World Trade Site. It looked a lot different from what I thought it would be. I couldn't believe I was at the place where so many people lost their lives. It just brought tears to my eyes.

We went to the Top of The Rock. This was at the top of the Rockefeller Center. The view was amazing. I couldn't enjoy it as much because I missed Matthew so much up there. It just didn't seem right that he wasn't there with me to enjoy it side by side. I love this city, but I love my life with my husband more....and with Moey...I miss him!

New York City Day 1

"To my dearest wife, Love them. As you leave remember to love those you see and meet with. Show them the passion and gentleness of Jesus. I am faithful you will leave a mark on those people you come in contact with. Do not be afraid or worrysome, there are no reason for them. You will have a great time and enjoy getting to know the high school girls. They might have been going to New York for the Lord to show them something. You belong there this week! Love it....Love them...I love you!"
**a bookmark Matthew gave me before the trip that gave me alot of strength out on the field...

Just a couple days ago, Wednesday December 02, 2009, I loaded a bus full of 34 high school students and 6 other adults leaders, headed to New York City for the Ginghamsburg Student Ministry 2009 NYC mission trip. I had some fear, but I had a whole lot of excitement.

I've always loved New York City. It's like the song goes..."New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there's nothing you can't do, in New York, New York, New York!!!" There's always been something magical to me about New York City. The city just looks so different than any other city that I've been to. It even smells different.

I had some mixed feelings approaching this trip. With my job, I usually interact with middle school students. My involvement with the high school students, let alone the juniors and seniors is very limited. I usually only see then pass through my office headed to Nick's. I have a very hard time trusting and connecting with people that I don't know. How am I going to connect with these students? In a city that I haven't been to in 10 years?

How am I going to love the people of NYC when I've found my life for the past couple of years has been focused on myself and the problems and circumstances that have faced Matthew and I for the first four years of our marriage. Honestly, my last mission trip was to Amsterdam, Holland...that was 4 years ago. My mind hasn't been in the spirit of serving people of a different city. Lord how am I going to do this?

But God is always good....he supplies all of our needs...and he's in the work of changing peoples hearts....more to come soon....stay tuned

...the love of grandparents unites all things....

"To feel the love of people whom we love is a fire that feeds our life. But to feel the affection that comes from those whom we do not know, from those unknown to us, who are watching over our sleep and solitude, over our dangers and our weaknesses--that is something still greater and more beautiful because it widens our the boundaries of our being, and unites all living things." Pablo Neruda, From "Childhood and Poetry"

I never knew my great grandfather, Earl Hunt. He passed away when I was too little to remember anything about him. I remember when I was a child, I would look at his pictures and sit very still and try to go back into the recesses of my brain to just see if I could remember anything about thim. My mind would always go blank, except for the many wonderful things that I was told about him. I feel that I knew my grandmother, Martha Helen Hunt as well as I possibly could at the time. She passed away when I was 15, and althought I think I knew a good portion about her, when I think about how well I know my grandmother at this time in my life, my interest in my great grandmother pales in comparision to the knowledge I have of my grandparents now. What a treasure I lost by a lack of interest. From everything that has been spoken about my great grandparents, their love for each other, and their love for Jesus, books couldn't contain the amazing qualities of both of them.

From what I have been told, my great grandma wanted to be a missionary. She was 18 at the time, had her bags packed and was ready to leave and my great-great grandfather wouldn't let her go. He refused. I think she saw her dreams quickly fading and went through a sort of hell. She didn't know what she wanted to do besides this. She met a man named Earl, found herself pregnant with my grammy and was quickly a bride and new wife. As far as I know, she never found herself on the mission field. BUT one thing is for certain, her love for Jesus never faded. He had a hold of her heart and wasn't letting go.

My great grandmother used to tickly my back and read to me when I would spend time at her house. She always had lemon drops, piano scrap paper and the best books. She would play with my hair as I would suck my thumb on her lap. She would lightly "tickle" my back and read me a Sesame Street book. The last page of this book had Big Bird being handed a tigerlily flower by one of his friends. To this day, this is my favorite flower and was the reason I carried a bouquet of these down the isle on my wedding day. It reminds me of my great-grandmother.

She was the first person who introduced me to Christ. I had always grown up knowing the bible stories and that Jesus loved me. But she was the one that put salvation into words. The love that she had for others showed the love of Jesus. She made Jesus real to me. My granny Jean made Jesus real. And my mother made Jesus real. Great Grandma was the leading examply of strong Godly women. What more could a child ask for?

She used to sit her chair and knit. And crochet. And knit some more....

My great-grandmother has been gone over 10 years. A couple of months back, my grandma was going through her attic. She found a bunch of my grandmothers yarn in a huge box. She asked me if I would like to have it. The other alternative was that it was either going to be donated, or it was going in the trash. Being the eco-friendly person that I am I couldn't see it heading to the dump. We took it home after one visit. It sat in the upstairs bedroom for many months, not being touched.

Then one day a 8th grade student at Merge, our student youth group, had an idea to start a knitting party at the Avenue. She had a big dream to get a group together to knit hats for those in the Dayton area who were homeless. Many times that dream was ignored but she persisted. I caught wind of the idea and I felt the spirit moving...Kim....you have a bunch of yarn with your great grannies name all over it. She wants you to use this for good.....Jesus wants you to use this for good.....

Needless to say, we had our first knitting party last Saturday. We had over 18 girls attend to learn and fellowship with one another. We had 7 adult women come to help. Over 2/3 of my great-granny's yard was taken by 13 and 14 year olds. To knit for the.....homeless.

I know that my great-grandmother would be proud of each and EVERY one of these wise ladies knitting for those individuals that are so close to Jesus' heart. It makes me even more grateful that I was one of those ladies at one time, sitting on my great grannies lap, having my back tickled and the love of Jesus being showered over me while I was spending time with my great grandmother. What I wouldn't give to know her now......

the smell of new colored pencils

it's been some time since I last wrote....when I'm in the midst of doing my daily tasks my mind is usually consumed by a million different thoughts and ideas. Many times things hit me like a ton a bricks and I say...."I need to blog about that." But then days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months and the ideas have passed. I've even begin to write it on my calendar to blog, but those days have come and gone. today's gonna be different.....

.... Matt lost his job last spring as a result of his school downsizing and since Matt only had one year seniority, he was the first to go. We hoped and prayed all summer that when fall would hit, he would be blessed to have a full time teaching job again. It's been two years since that happened. And his dream of being a full time public high school teacher has still been unfulfilled. But we're learning. We both were dreading going through the subbing motions once again. Sometimes I even think I dreaded it more than he did and he was the one doing it. The nervousness of possibly not getting called the next day can really send you into a tailspin. Will I have work tomorrow and the next day?.... ...But one thing I'm learning is to be grateful for EVERY moment...

I was taking Moey on his walk one day last week. It was a chilly fall morning. The clock had just struck 8 a.m. and Moey was stretching on our bed. He scratches his eyes a bit with his "teradactle" paws, sticks his tongue out as far as it can go as I urge him : "come on moey....time to get up sleepy head" (he actually sleeps longer than we do) I grab my shoes, sit on the tile kitchen floor why he does his yoga stretches to warm up.... I grab my red coat with my red ear warmers. I already have red pants on so I look like a big RED crayon walking down the road. Grab the pooper scooper bag, stick his head through the harness and off we go. .. It's time to walk the neighborhood!

This particular morning Moey decided to smell EVERY leaf he could possibly get to. These particular mornings can somewhat be stressful because the wind just starts to pick up when he decides to smell something and you're left catching the breeze at full force. I turned down the cul-de-sac (as we didn't have much time this morning), made him walk on the other side of the road because that one particular house has a dear older lady who likes to feed cats (which in turn leaves big piles in the yard that Moey thinks is dessert) and we make our way back the road. After eating several worms, avoiding a dead bird, and stopping for a squat we head back the way we came after we circled around. Mind you this walk was pretty frustrating. I hadn't spent my time with Jesus that morning, I was already feeling rushed, I was cold....and it seemed like a lot of things were on my plate. I was just S-T-R-E-S-S-E-D. My love for Mr. Mo just wasn't able to conquer my frustrations that morning.

On the corner of that cul-de-sac though, is a man that I've seen around town a lot since we've lived at our place. He has always been so nice and will always wave as he walks by our house to the library. He was outside raking his leaves and putting them in a big pile at the side of the road for the city workers to come pick up. He's deaf. I've known this since the first time I waved and exchanged words with him. It never made me feel differently about him. This was just part of who he was. He looked up at me, smiled at Moey and then said "Good morning! How are you doing?" To which I replied. "I'm good, How are you doing?" But by the time "I'm" came out of my mouth, he had already looked down and was continuing to rake. I felt like I just got slapped across the face. Not because of what could be assumed as him being rude from others, but because God got right in my face to say:

"What are you complaining about?"

Instantly tears sprung to my eyes.

I have NOTHING to be ungrateful for.

I have NOTHING to complain about.

I have NO IDEA the struggles that this man has had to face because he can't hear the birds sings.....the leaves crunching with each swipe of the rake...

Since that day, I've been trying to look at things from the perspective of being grateful. No longer do I say "God this really sucks that Matt doesn't have a consistent job right now" Those words have been transformed into--

God I THANK YOU that through this trial you are transforming my husband into the man that you desire him to be.

I THANK YOU that you're working in our marriage to where money isn't our focus anymore.

I THANK YOU that my husband isn't desiring a job anymore for STATUS or to buy MORE things.

God I THANK YOU for my job, even though it's challenging at times.

I THANK YOU for this very breath that I take....and may that breath be full of your spirit and not just dead air that lacks joy and gratefulness, peace and sustinance.

I THANK YOU Jesus for being patient with me....and willing to work out my own kinks....

I have NOTHING to be UNGRATEFUL for....

Gratefulness is like newly sharpened colored pencils wrapped in a bouquet...the look and smell is so wonderful you don't want to grab one and start using it cause you know you'll mess it up....