our new surprise...chasing what matters..parable of the sower

In the previous month, we've had many requests as to what our surprise is that "makes us smile". We got many many inquires as to if we are pregnant, but seriously people, if you know us very well at all, you know that this isn't a goal for Matt and I currently at the moment. We're completely content with it just being us. No kids in our near future, unless God blesses us with a surprise! But we did want to update all of you out there in cyberspace that may not know. Our surprise is: We closed on our first home!!!

On May 15th, 2008 Matt and I sat down at the closing table, wonderng what we were getting ourselves into. I was completely out of breath and nervous that we were making a big mistake, much to Matthew's embarrassement sitting next to me. I really could hardly breathe! We had seen this house back in the beginning of March, only four days after it went on the market. Within a week we put an offer in and the seller accepted. Since then it's been a matter of time doing inspections and getting repairs done.
About two weeks before we closed, Matthew and I both started to fall into the trap of "We need this, and we need that". We made a HUGE wish list of all the items that we "supposedly" needed, but as we were walking through Lowe's one evening, I know the Holy Spirit stunned my heart. Why all of a sudden do I think I need these items? Of course there are some staple items like a lawnmower, a big waste can (which we hope to not fill too often), and some clippers for the weeds and small unwanted trees. But do we really need a wheelbarrow? Do I really need a big tall ladder?
I started painting the ceiling last Friday, and the realization came into my head. I need a ladder. But then my Spirit started to provoke me to think about what the money to buy a ladder could go for. I have a chair. I can paint the ceiling with a chair. Of course, I'll have to get up and down and up and down, and I'll get a ton of paint in my hair and on my face. But it's good for my bones to get some exercise. After all we live in a pretty obese nation, I could use the movement.
This makes me think of the commercial that is played so frequently on the televisions. It's a Chase commerical where the wife finally gives in and lets the husband go shop for a new tv to the tune of "I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it NOW". What kind of message is that saying to our children? Does a big screen television really give you fullfillment? If anything it just states what your priorities are in your home. Obviously the tv is a main focal point if you need one the size of the Titanic. Chase has a slogan that says, "Chase what matters." In our society is that what matters? Buying more things is far from chasing freedom. It only pulls the rope tighter.
Our flower beds are going through a sort of overhaul currently. The previous owner(understandably) let the flower beds go, and the weeds at the side and back of the house were litterally up to Matt's waist. The weeds at the back of the property were up and over Matt's shoulders. Matt spent the first week gutting down the major ones (It took him a week, every night!) And last evening I spent some time with my little claw thingy and dug up all the small stubborn weeds. I only got to the corner of our house because it was pretty exhausting. It made me think of the parable of the sower. It says in Matthew 13:22:
"The seed cast in the weeds is the person who hears the
kingdom news, but weeds of worry and illusions about getting
more and wanting everything under the sun strangle what was
heard, and nothing comes of it."
As I was weeding that garden I was usuing my claw thing and scraping and scraping dirt from that root. I used my spade and dug down deep. I had my little garden gloves and pulled and pulled on those roots with all my strength. I seriously felt like my eyeballs were bulging. No matter how hard I grunted, how many times I yelled and called it "stupid", some just wouldn't budge. On some I even had to get the shovel and dig the whole thing up instead of pulling. Once the root sprung up from the soil, the little veins and mud stuck to those veins told the entire story. Those roots didn't want to let go, just like the weeds of worry and doubt don't want me to find freedom in Christ as Christ intends and for the reason He came. To set us all free. So chasing what brings freedom isn't buying more items and racking up a huge bill that I can't pay. Having freedom is living in the simplicity of the blessings that Christ has already blessed you with.
Since we purchased this new home, and our prayers for this have been answered, I've been finding it difficult to find things to pray for. My life is overflowing with blessings. The hard times that I've posted in earlier blogs don't seem so heavy. And I've come to learn that my God isn't a God that needs for me to beg to Him for the needs that we have. Once I've uplifted them once, he knows my heart. He will do what he says and promises in due time. Joy complete.

tales of a beagle

Yesterday afternoon, Matthew and I went to my parents house for a good ol fashioned Memorial Day weenie roast. We hadn't been to my parents for a while, so it was nice to spent some time with them and also with the rest of the extended family. (We missed you Emily, Chip and Steph!) The best part of all, without trying to offend my family, was spending some time with my puppy CoCo. Since the last time we saw her, we could tell a big difference in her health.

For CoCo's entire life, she has always been a very social, happy, joyful and sometimes onry companion. She never wanted to be alone in a room by herself, but was never clingy. She could of ate an entire bag of dog food, but would still beg for your table scraps. And she always knew when you needed her the most. She would jump up on the couch you were sitting on, sit very close to you, lick your tears away before they feel to the ground, and then would throw her shoulder into your side. That was her way of being there for you.

She is still all of those characteristics and more, but you can see her slowly declining. Her back two legs are giving out on her going up and down stairs, and her hearing is completely gone. She fell pretty bad last evening trying to come down the deck stairs, only to spring tears to my eyes. The look of struggle in her eyes was enough to make you want to carry her everywhere you went. My hearstrings felt as if they were being plucked to the point of snapping. I hate to see her this way.


I spend some time last evening with her while she was snoozing on the couch cusion. I tried to get as close as possible, with the flash off on the camera. I would hide the camera behind my back and make a quick dash for a picture. Even thought I had the flash off, with her being so camera shy, if she sees the camera she wakes up fully and makes a dash, as quickly as she can behind the couch.

I know the ending for her is near. She has had a good, long life. This August she will be turning 15. It's hard to believe so much time has passed. I have so many wonderful memories with CoCo. She really has my heart....

Gorgeously Green step 1: composting

Recently I checked out a book from the library called: Gorgeously Green by Sophie Uliano. I first saw her and heard about this book on the Oprah Show. I requested it from the library and a couple of days later I began reading.

As I child, I remember going to my uncle's house with my grandpa before our annual vacation to Coldwater, Michigan. We would trek back to the far right corner of his property, wearing our big rubber boots and gloves, and head back to the compost pile. My grandpa, my uncle and I would open the little gate and start flipping over the piles of leaves and food waste. Once the leaves were flipped over, we witnessed BIG FAT JUICY worms!!! We would collect and collect many many worms and place them in our little styrofoam containers filled with dirt. These were our BIG FAT JUICY fishing worms! We caught the best blue gill off of these healthy worms.

I have been looking into starting a compost pile and considering how I would go about doing this a little over a year now. I'm ready to take the challenge. In Gorgeously Green, Sophie explains just how easy it is to start your own pile, and realy how UN-gross it is. When I think of composting the first thing that comes to mind is smelly, old, decaying items. But the more that I read into the process, it sounds absolutely amazing. After the composting has fully decayed, you have fertilizer. The benefits to the planet are astrinomical. Matthew and I have cut down our trash now to a half of a 13 gallon trash bag a week. So a full 13 gallon every two weeks. When I think about what's in that 13 gallons, it surprises me what could be composted. Below I've listed over 30 things, just in our weekly trash that can be heaped onto the pile:

****paper napkins (even though rarely use these to begin with.....cloth napkins baby!) *Post-it notes * wood chips *popcorn * leaves *spices * grass clippings * potato peelings * weeds * stale bread * coffee ground (can you say daily, sometimes twice a day?) *tea bags * shredded newspaper * egg shells * houseplant trimmings * receipts * kleenex tissues (allergy season anyone? uhh me too) * flower petals * stale potatoe chips * moldy cheese * shredded cardboard * apple cores * outdated yogurt * toenail clippings :) * watermelon rinds * dryer lint * bread crusts * cooked rice * banana peels * burned toast * vacuum cleaner bag contents * greeting-card envelopes * dirt from soles of shoes and boots ****

Look at all those items! All of this is going in the landfill when I could be making fresh fertilizer for my plants.
There are many different ways of compositing. You can just have a bin, water it down every so often if it is warm and dry. Or you can try vermicomposting. I haven't fully decided on how I would like to do this, but I'm leaning toward vermicomposting just for the benefits of quick compost and our own worms this July for a trip. From what I've read, depending upon how many worms you have in your pile, your waste can be turned into fresh silt within a week!



I'm excited to start doing this. I'm actually going to the local bait shop on the way home today just to get some prices on worms. It sounds so weird that I'm going to purchase worms, but I'm excited for the prospect of saving just a little bit more of the planet, and making my own footprint that much smaller!!

Here are a couple of site that I found interesting about worms and also about composting....

http://www.unclejim.com/
http://www.compostguide.com/

when the promises are mixed with faith

"So watch your step, friends. Make sure there's no evil unbelief lying around that will trip you up and throw you off course, diverting you from the living God. For as long as its still God's Today, keep each other on your toes so sin doesn't slow down your reflexes. If we can only keep our grip on the sure thing we started out with, we're in this with Christ for the long haul........They never got there because they never listened, never believed.....but the promises didn't do them a bit of good because they didn't receive the promises with faith. If we believe, though, we'll experience that state of resting. But not if we don't have faith.....God keeps renewing the promise and setting the date as Today...."
Hebrew 3 and 4 various verses in the Message.

I feel like we're on a bit of a faith journey right now. It's sort of hard to explain in words, especially for those of you out there in cyberspace. (so please excuse me if this doesn't make sense). I've been trying to understand the concept of the words faith and believe. Many times in the Bible those words are used. In The Message the word faith is used 162 times and believe 189 times. But what do those words really mean....I mean REALLY mean when you apply them personally to your life.

I've been noticing a pattern in my life growing up. I always based my belief on the things that I could see. Of course I believed in Jesus and God. That they existed. But when you apply their existence in your own personal life, your day to day experiences, where do they fit in? You can believe in God and Jesus but their existence doesn't effect your life in any way, shape, or form. I've known individuals who said they believed in Jesus, but it didn't change how they treated others, viewed what God blessed them with, changed how they treated those at the supermarket. Oh yeah, they believed, but they still remained in their life as if that existence didn't change anything for them. I always have based my belief on a human level, but my eyes are being opened to belief in the heavenly level. I'd like to think it's from God's perspective, at least I hope it is.

What if the things that Matthew and I desire are right in front of our faces. So reachable, but from our perspective, they seem unreachable. Unreachable because we have never listened, never believed. (real belief, not the mystical use of the word) What type of belief is that to reach those things that God is giving you but you can't see? The belief that makes things visible?

Further down in Hebrews it says : "While he lived on earth, anticipating death, Jesus cried out in pain and wept in sorrow as he offered up priestly prayers to God. Because he honored God, God answered him. Though he was God's Son, he learned trusting-obedience by what he suffered, just as we do."

We are defiently not suffering by any means, so please do not confuse me with saying our trials and complications are anywhere near the suffering of our Glorious Jesus. But I believe this verse states that we learn through troubles, just as Jesus learned, if we learn through a trusting-obedience type of relationship with God.

"Parched ground that soaks up the rain and then produces an abundance of carrots and corn for its gardener gets God's "Well done!" But if it produces weeds and thistels, it's more likely to get cussed out. Fields like that are burned, not harvested. .... And now I want each of you to extend that same intensity toward a full-bodied hope, and keep at it till the finish. Don't drag your feet. Be like those who stay the course with committed faith and then get everything promised to them."

I don't feel like we know what we're doing....really. I don't know what we should be doing, but I do know what I don't want to be doing with this present moment, this Today. I don't want to produce weeds and thistels with today. I don't want to be burned, my life, my field to be a big fat waste. I want my life to produce a harvest. A harvest of faith, of grace and mercy towards others. I want to quit this selfish lifestyle, who only serves myself. I want to live a life full of trust, faith, and belief. But Lord how do I do that?

05/08/08

I waited and waited and waited for God. At last he looked; finally he listened.
He lifted me out of the ditch, pulled me from deep mud.
He stood me up on a solid rock to make sure I wouldn't slip.
He taught me how to sing the latest God-song, a praise-song to our God.
More and more people are seeign this: they enter the mystery, abandoning themselves to God.

Blessed are you who give yourselves over to GOD, turn your backs
on the world's "sure thing", ignore what the world worships;
The world's a huge stockpile of God-wonders and God-thoughts.
Nothing and no one comes close to you!
I start talking about you, telling what I know, and quickly run out of words.
Neighter numbers nor words account for you.

Doing something for you, bringing something to you--that's not what you're after.
Being religious, acting pious--that's not what you're asking for.
You've opened my ears so I can listen.

So I answered, "I'm coming. I read in your letter what you wrote about me,
And I'm coming to the party you're throwing for me."
That's when God's Word entered my life, became part of my very being.

I've preached you to the whole congregation, I've kept back nothing, GOD--you know that.
I didn't keep the news of your ways a secret, didn't keep it to myself.
I told it all, how dependable you are, how thorough. I didn't hold back pieces of love and truth.
For myself along, I told it all, let the congregation know the whole story.

Now GOD, don't hold out on me, don't hold back your passion.
Your love and truth are all that keeps me together.
When troubles ganged up on me, a mob of sins past counting,
I was so swamped by guilt I couldn't see my way clear.
More guilt in my heart than hair on my head, so heavy the guilt that my heart gave out.

Soften up, GOD, and intervene; hurry and get me some help,
So those who are trying to kidnap my soul will be embarrassed and lose face,
So anyone who gets a kick out of m aking me miserable will be heckled and disgraced,
So those who pray for my ruin will be booed and jeered without mercy.

But all who are hunting for you--oh, let them sing and be happy.
Let those who know what you're all about tell the world you're great and not quitting.
And me?I'm a mess. I'm nothing and have nothing:make something of me.
You can do it; you've got what it takes--but GOD, don't put it off.
Psalm 40 The Message

endorphins

I heard once, that any type of excerise, is especially good for those individuals going through stressful times or those going through fits of depression. While Matt and I currently aren't going through a time of depression, we are definetly in some stressful times. Probably the most stress we've felt in a very long time, probably in our entire marriage.
I heard that exercising is a way for your brain to enduce endorphins into your system. Once those endorphins are released, generally your outlook on life becomes a little clearer. I looked up the word endorphins online at dictionary.com and this is what it said, not a guarantee that it is 100% acurate:

Endorphins are long chains of amino acids, or polypeptides, that are able to bind to the neuroreceptors in the brain and are capable of relieving pain in a manner similar to that of morphine....Besides behaving as a pain reducer, endorphins are also thought to be connected to euphoric feelings, appetite modulation, and the release of sex hormones. Prolonged, continuous exercise contributes to an increased production of endorphins and, in some people, the subsequent "runner's high."

We should of ran more last week....after getting the stressful news a couple of weeks ago, we vegged out on the couch and threw ourselves pity party after pity party. We let our stress get the best of us. Took a week off from running, until....
Yesterday afternoon/evening, we went to a metro park not far from our house (pic above). We decided to do some walking on the trails, and then end it with a long run up and down the hills of the root covered, spiderwebbed from branch to branch trail aptly named the "green trail". Overall it's about 2-3 miles long. We only ran about 2 of those miles, but man! were the endorphins running on full speed yesterday!!! I personally just couldn't stop jogging. It felt so amazing to get the stress out of my bones. We definelty should of done this a week earlier, my waistline would probably look a little more slimming and my heart wouldn'y have to beat so hard to pump by blood through my lazy last week body. I was definetly feeling the "runner's high" that I had forgetton about, as it was masked in the self loathing and pain of the week.

The metropark is amazing, and I'm so thankful that we live next to a wonderful park like this. Before we moved up north, I took advantage of this park while growing up. It was just the place we went to feed the ducks, eat KFC with our families, and celebrated our birthdays. But since we've moved back to the area, it has become sort of a sanctuary for us. A place to release our stress and troubles, and leave them on the path behind us.....

though the cherry trees don't blossom

Matthew and I received some pretty disappointing news last Friday. I will leave it unnamed, but it was something that we had both hoped that would happen. Matt more than myself I think. We were so sure that this was something that God was going to allow to happen for us, that when we recieved the news, emotions flowed to the tune of "Where did we get this wrong?"
It pretty much stunned us the entire weekend. It really set us back a few, flew us against the wall, and swept our feet out from under us. What do we do now? Where do we go from here? It brought me to a place where I succombed to the temptation of questioning the character of God. But I soon came to realize the deception from the Enemy and knew that God's love for us didn't change because of this. If anything, he was holding us so close, realizing our dissappointment and sadness, encouraging us to press on.
This week I've been searching the Word for explainations of the concept of hope. Individuals throughout my life have said "don't get your hopes up". But what is the difference between "not getting your hopes up" and having your hope in the Lord? I'm starting to understand that having your hopes in situations is when you start to get your hopes up. Having hope in the Lord has nothing to do with that. They are two separate concepts.
Some things that the Lord has revealed to me this week, I've posted below. Hopefully they'll inspire all of you out there, and you'll come to a new understanding of what Jesus means when he says to keep your hope.

"Though the cherry trees don't blossom
and the strawberries don't ripen,

Though the apples are worm-eaten and the wheat fields stunted,

Though the sheep pens are sheepless and the cattle barns empty,

I'm singing joyful praise to GOD.
I'm turning cartwheels of joy to my Savior God.
Counting on GOD's Rule to prevail, I take heart and gain strength.

I run like a deer. I feel like I'm king of the mountain!"
~~Habakkuk 17-19 The Message

"Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;

all the stages of my life were spread out before you,

The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day."

~Psalm 139:15-16 The Message

"God always does what he says, and is gracious in everything he does. God gives a hand to those down on their luck, gives a fresh start to those ready to quit."
~~Psalm 145:13-14 The Message

"Everything God does is right--the trademark on all his works is love."
~~Psalm 145:17